{"id":1814,"date":"2016-11-24T13:35:39","date_gmt":"2016-11-24T17:35:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.simpleserenity.com\/blog\/?p=1814"},"modified":"2016-11-24T14:01:31","modified_gmt":"2016-11-24T18:01:31","slug":"finding-powerful-human-connection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.simpleserenity.com\/blog\/extraordinary-reading\/finding-powerful-human-connection\/","title":{"rendered":"The Way to Finding Powerful Human Connection"},"content":{"rendered":"

Guest post by Leo Babauta, Zen Habits<\/a><\/small><\/p>\n

As I write this, I\u2019m sitting in cloud-filled rainforest at a retreat in Ecuador, surrounded by the calls of thousands of tropical birds and creatures, dense lush greenery, and some of the most open-hearted human beings I\u2019ve ever met.<\/p>\n

Before I came here, I had some anxiety about meeting everyone, worried what they might think of me, worried that I would be awkward at talking to everyone or not fit in. This anxiety made me not want to come. That would have been a huge mistake.<\/p>\n

I realized that I was telling myself a story about how bad I am at public speaking, at meeting new people, about how unworthy I am of others liking me. This story was not helpful, and was getting in the way of me doing something with the potential to be amazing. So I asked myself if it was definitely true, and the answer was, \u201cI don\u2019t know.\u201d<\/p>\n

That \u201cI don\u2019t know\u201d scares me. I decided I had to look at the \u201cI don\u2019t know\u201d in a different way \u2014 so I told myself instead, \u201cI don\u2019t know, and I would love to find out. Who knows what I\u2019ll discover?\u201d<\/p>\n

This helped me to get on the plane, and then I was forced to meet an entire group of 24 strangers. And I could see them as 24 people who were potentially going to judge me \u2026 or I could see them as fellow human beings, who have aspirations and who struggle, who have love for others and frustration and anger, who want to be better people and who are disappointed in themselves that they are not, who want to make a difference in the world and feel guilty that they procrastinate, who are beautiful but who judge themselves, who are so different from me in many wonderful ways but who at their core have the same tender heart of humanity beating with strength and fragility, just like me.<\/p>\n

I met them, and smiled. I felt the anxiety coming up again, but I turned with curiosity to them. I felt myself wanting to run away and be alone and comfortable, but I tried to find their aspirations and struggles.<\/p>\n

I opened my heart to them, and they came in with kindness. And changed me. And made the effort of overcoming my fear and anxiety of being judged and failing completely worth the effort, a thousand times over.<\/p>\n

Human connection is not so common in our age of connectivity. We see lots of people but find our little cucoons to hide in. We don\u2019t realize we\u2019re craving a deeper connection with others until we find it.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s hard to connect, because cultural norms get in the way \u2014 we\u2019re supposed to talk about the weather and sports and the news, but not our deepest struggles. We\u2019re supposed to say cool or witty things, but not share our greatest hopes for our lives or the person we want to become.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s hard, but human connection is one of the most powerful forces available to us. We don\u2019t realize we thirst for it, but we do, and the thirst is deep. When I find real human connection, it nourishes my soul, changes me, moves me to tears. I can\u2019t count how many times I\u2019ve cried this week. My heart feels raw, in a way that opens it up to further connection.<\/p>\n

So how do we connect, when it\u2019s so hard? I\u2019d like to share some thoughts:<\/p>\n